My Bright and Shine Day ^^

Location: on my couch
Date and Time: Wednesday, January the 6th 2010, 11:23 PM (Bangkok, Hanoi, Jakarta)
Listening: Blue Bird by Ikimno Gakari
Watching: My Boss My Hero eps. 05
Reading: my weird short story
Eating: sop kacang merah + telur mata sapi
Drinking: Dora Oxygen Water

Konbanwa minna~ ^^
I'm really in a good mood today..
actually, today, I got stuck in my university building, coz it's raining.. well, actually, it was a rainstorm, never been this worst before...
so, I have a talking with my best friend, Moncy, I really thankful for the rain today, coz I can spent a great time with her ^^.
on my last post, I'm really in a dark mood, it's even scary for me to read it, how poisonous.. :P
well, I have a problem with my self.. I think I have a fight with my other-rebellious-side of my self. But, today... I make her disapear.. hahahahagz... deeply thanks for Moncy.. *kissu kissu Moncy*

Bdw, I never think bout it before.. it's a feeling I forgot I have...
about trusting other, and tell to them how ur feeling is...
I'm a complicated girl... and guess I already complicated, even when I'm just a kid...
I remember how I try to tell my friends bout my problem, but they never get it, they thing I'm weird, and have a strange way of thinking.. so they just ignored me...
Time after time, its just the same thing happens to me...that people around me never get my point, thy never understand, or even try to understand...
so in a certain time, I stop trying to make them understand...
I said to my self..
"that shallow minded person would never understand our complicated mind... jadi, beri saja mereka sesuatu yang bisa dengan mudah mereka cerna.."
and that's what exactly what I did... I become someone they get easily understand, I become approachable, open people, someone who always make other people happy.. someone simple...
that's all what they think...
but me, myself.. never changed since the day I say that to myself.. I'm still complicated, but no one see it.. :P

but today, Moncy makes me believe that there's someone who can understands me, someone who cares, and someone who always listens to what I say... someone who understand my feelings... than I find my trauma faded away.. little by little...
and I'll forever thank you for Moncy... ^^

Owh, bout my mother's problem...
I find a very good solution to make it all better... for me
that I'm her precious... and she knows I can be a human if I try hard enough...
she just want me be on my best... she just want me be happy, no matter what, and have no regret...
I know she loves me a lot... (and I love her too ^^)... all she want is, she is not here, by my side, in faint...
fuuuh... okaa-sama...
I will try my best... I'll give u a great surprise.. a very good one ^^...
I'm not gonna make u down..
dakara.. oka-sama...
hora!! I'll reach that star above.. just for u...
*kissu kissu oka-sama*


and I'm still
searching for life
--Oujo--